Being there

Just be there.
When they need a shoulder to cry on.
When they need a hand in the garden.
When they need comforting advice.
When they need a ride to the doctor.
When they need a hug.

One friend, perplexed by her family’s detached reaction to her dad’s sudden death, just wanted to talk. Another friend, struggling to accept her mother’s debilitating illness, needed to know where to turn for help. A stranger I stumbled upon through awork-related phone call lamented the painful woes of a recent divorce. I listened. In the course of a single day, each of these opportunities to “be there” came my way. Note that I said opportunities and not burdens. Attitude is everything. Actually, each of us could put in many hours as honorary counselors every day. Perhaps if we were “there” more often for one another, our world would be a happier place.

I have little wisdom to offer these frazzled folks, but I do have an attentive ear, an open mind and a compassionate heart. We need to tap into those characteristics in each of our parishes. We need to open parishioners’ ears, minds and hearts to the opportunity to serve one another in basic, simple ways.

Make eye contact at Mass or in the parking lot. Don’t be in such a hurry. When someone calls from church needing a favor, chat with the person. Listen. Be present. Hey, I know it’s tough. We’re already pulled in so many directions. But if we’re there for others, maybe they’ll be there for us someday — to listen, to lessen the load. 

As many party invitations read, “Your presence is the best present.” Trite but true. We need to be there for our children, for our parents, for our brothers and sisters. We need to explore their feelings and seize the opportunity to impart what little wisdom we have. We need to hear our parents’ or neighbors’ frustration with growing old and offer to lighten their loads in any way we can. Formal ministry is all well and good, but it is these informal opportunities that bring the Gospel to life in such vivid ways.

A toddler who lives across the street was there for an injured bird, helping it recover when it had been attacked by a cat. I listened as he shared his story even though I was already late for an appointment. As it turned out, the doctor was even later than I was, so my friends had to “be there” as I lamented the trials of medical waiting rooms and medical services in general.

Our catechism quotes St. Leo the Great in calling us to live our life in Christ:

“Christian, recognize your dignity and, now that you share in God’s own nature, do not return to your former base condition by sinning. Remember who is your head and of whose body you are a member” (1691).

As members of the Body of Christ, we are called to “be there” for each other. We must call those in our midst to do likewise.

ML

Vickie LoPiccolo Jennett is a professional writer whose church ministries have included both lay and staff positions over the past 15 years. She worked with Paula Hagen to develop three Ministry of Mothers Sharing (MOMS) books. Her e-mail address is viclj@worldnet.att.net.
 

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